Written February 2nd, 2022, 2:35pm

Entry #17:

Dear Aspiring Mama, 

What has come up for you since I invited you to declare your dream? 

Have you embarked on a Dream Week yet?

Let me guess. Does this sound like you?

You’re feeling resistance around having a dream week. You’ve written out your dream(s) but it doesn’t feel quite right?

You’re wondering what’s wrong. You can sense the fear. And hear the voice of overwhelm repeatedly ask how you could ever make any of those dreams happen. 

So you start getting nervous.

You wonder: 

Do I even want this dream? 

And what if I don’t even enjoy it if ever it does come true?

You want this to be light and fun but it the exercise of declaring your dream is feeling everything but. Pressure has started creeping in. 

I mean, there are things you feel clearly called to but it feels like so much! 

Isn’t having a dream week supposed to be fun? 

How can you get past this resistance and shut up the voice that says that you have other things to do?

How can this feel less scary? 

And how can you stop caring so much what the voice in your head has to say?

Gurrrrllll, you are not alone!

About 30min ago the person described above was 100% me! 

But you know what? All it took was a few minutes to get back on track and allow my dream to flow through again. And so let’s get you back into dream state and having fun with declaring your dream, ok?

ACKNOWLEDGE HOW YOU FEEL

First, acknowledge how you are feeling. Be brutally honest. 

If: 

You are feeling afraid, say it. 

You don’t feel like declaring your dream, be gentle. 

Grief of disappointments past are coming up and all you want to do is cry, cry. 

How you feel is how you feel. 

Start honouring your feelings the same way my daughter does.

When Alicia is upset, she lets it be known. She will cry, yell, and sometimes throw herself on the floor to unleash her upset on it.

But then she sees the marble she loves. Doesn’t even wipe her tears, gets up, and runs to her beloved “ball ball” and starts laughing again.

She doesn’t make herself wrong for feeling upset that I didn’t give her another ice cube. She simple lets the feeling move through her until she is ready to move on. 

And move on she always does.

Ok, maybe don’t act exactly like a toddler, but you get my drift, yes?

REMOVE THE PEBBLE IN YOUR SHOE

Another way I like to look at this is by using what I like to call the “Pebble In Your Shoe” method.

Ever had a pebble in your shoe?

What did you do?

Did you keep on walking hoping it would go away on its own and tolerate the discomfort with every step?

Or,

Did you stop, take off your shoe, and shake it out to quickly find the hop back in your step?

I thought so. 

Those tough emotions are pebbles. Acknowledge that they are there. Pause. Shake them off. And quickly you will see that you are back on track. 

NB: I’m not trying to downplay the time it takes to allow big emotions to flow through us. We will talk more about dealing with these in the coming weeks. And as always, do what works for you. Get support to work through these—the same way you might lean on a friend or a tree to get that pebble out of your shoe! Lean on others. Hire a coach (hello!), therapist, mentor. Call a friend. Do what you need to do, just don’t let those emotions take a hold of you. 

THINGS CAN GET MESSY

Dream week can bring up a lot of stuff!

You may find yourself confronted by the realization that your life is about to change significantly. And things might get messy before they feel aligned again.

To this I say: 

Bless this mess! 

Bring it the fuck on!

That resistance you feel? Chances are it is your ego and limiting beliefs trying to hang on for dear life.

The release will come as you keep making room for your dreams to rise. They know how to push through the bullshit. Your job is to surrender. To stop trying to make sense of it all. And to:

STAY CURIOUS

Take 7 days to be in curiosity of your dreams without any expectation of having to act on them—yet or ever. 

You might be eager to get things going, but just the act of declaring your dreams and playing with them might initiate the process of cleaning up the messy parts and set you on the path of your highest calling at this point in your life.

IT MAY NOT BE EASY, BUT IT IS ALWAYS WORTH IT

A few years ago, I was doing the exercise of writing out my dreams while using the prompt: Wouldn’t it be cool if…

I was lit up by by what was rising in me!

Then, my light dimmed.

I wasn’t living anywhere close to the dreams that had come up, namely to live by a surf break and start a family. I was living in the city and was in a relationship with a perfect guy who wasn’t perfect for me—and who sure as hell wasn’t ready to start a family. 

It took months before I honoured myself. I didn’t have the tools and guidance that I am now sharing with you.

I ended the relationship.

Left the city. 

Lived by the ocean for 7 months and fulfilled my dream of surfing well enough that I could teach my kids one day. 

And I met my match. 

May you stay willing to trust the process. 

Allow your dreams to rise. I will guide you in taking aligned action soon enough, I promise!

A NOTE ON OVERWHELM

Overwhelm can be a little bitch. 

But she does have insight by her side. 

You see, she usually shows up when we are trying to over complicate things, dim our light, or trying desperately to get it right. 

Hear me:

1. Declaring your dream is simple. Put pen to paper or speak it out loud. Allow what comes up to come up. Keep it simple. The idea is to simply give yourself space to wonder for a week.  
2. You are an infinite being. Do not under any circumstance dim your light for anyone. 
3. There is no “right” or “wrong” dream. And you don’t even have to follow through on any of the dreams that come up for you! 

WHY THE PRESSURE?

Chances are you feel like you “should” be doing something different right now. You’ve told yourself it should be done a certain way.

Let’s bring the PLEASURE back, ok!

Try this:

Imagine that money, time, energy, and all the things that you sometimes think are limited, are abundant in your life! 

You can have Jeff Bezos’ bank account, 50h days, and energy like a toddler! 

Remove limitations. 

You can try on different dreams and see which ones light you up! Hell, if you want to dream that you’re Michael Jordan in his prime for the next 10min, go for it! 

For now, just take 10min. 

Take out your journal. 

Set a timer to 10min. 

See what is trying to emerge. 

Let the dreams in your heart flow through your pen. 

Allow them gush out from your soul. 

Give your mind a break—it thinks too much.

Ok?

10min. Go!

Have fun!

 

With love & light,

Melissa