Should you become a mom given the state of our world? Are more kids really what the world needs right now? There’s a global pandemic, war, disease, an environmental crisis, and the list goes on.

In today’s episode of the Create Your Motherhood Summer Series we explore different ways you can answer this for yourself while feeling empowered to honour your journey and make a positive impact on our planet. 

I get it. Not only is it important to ask ourselves whether having children or not is truly right for us, it is also important to consider the world in which we plan on raising them. So if you have these thoughts looming in your mind or around you, you’re in the right place. 

First, whether or not to have children is muy importante.

Not everyone wants to have children, can, or should. So let’s expand our view of motherhood as it can be expressed in many different ways. Many that don’t involve having kids at all.

I’m most concerned with you aligning your life to the expression of motherhood that you are most called to—not from any outside voice, but rather, your wiser inner voice that wants to guide you to living the truest most fulfilled expression of your life. 

Whatever your calling might be, kids or no kids, doesn’t make you any less of a mother. Honouring your true calling and living your authentic expression of motherhood makes you a fucking badass one!

Second, I acknowledge you for being someone with the level of awareness and care for the well-being of our home, planet Earth.

And for being an aspiring mama who is consciously thinking about her journey and exploring the path to motherhood that feels most aligned with her values and truth. We will explore different ways becoming a mom can have a positive impact on our planet below.

Third, let’s create an empowering question to live into.

Remove the “should” and “should nots” from the conversation. As everything on your journey to and through motherhood, it is rarely ever so black or white. Rather, it’s an array of colours—a multitude of possibilities and ultimately my hope is to support you in making the choices that feel most aligned for you.

So instead of thinking: 

“I want to be a mom BUT the world is a crazy place right now” 

Try shifting the BUT to an AND. Notice what happens: 

“I want to be a mom AND the world is a crazy place right now.”

How does that feel in your body?

Does it open up possibility for you?

I hope that it feels more expansive and light. 

NB: I don’t believe that the world is a crazy place but using this wording as I have heard it described as such. I believe that there is much beauty and hope and love. And the most beautiful kind of crazy are those people who are here to make the world a better place in their own way. I like to think of myself as that kind of crazy. A mama on a mission to make the world a better place. This post is a small expression of that.

So let’s continue our exploration about whether or not you should even consider becoming a mom given the current state of our planet.

THERE ARE MANY WAYS TO BE A “MOTHER”

What do you think about when you think of becoming a mom?

A few years ago, my view on what it meant to be a mother was limited to the idea that “I had to” conceive, carry, birth, and raise children. 

Upon reflection and guidance from a coach, I began to see that the expression of what it meant to be a mom could be expressed in many different ways. 

One of my clients says it best. This is what she shared with me after working together and realizing her dream of having a baby: 

You don’t have to wait till you have children to be a mom. You can decide right now to express what being a mom means to you. To let the essence of mother play out in your world.

Explore what being a mom means to you. And uncover your truth. 

When I dug deep, I knew that at the core of me was a calling to follow the path of conceiving, carrying, birthing, and raising babies. And to do this with a partner that I loved. I could have pretended otherwise, but I knew that this was the expression of motherhood I was aligning my life to. Or rather, felt called to align my life to.

On my way there, I cultivated the qualities of “mother” in me that I dreamt of expressing in the world. 

A woman who choses not to have children or who can’t for whatever reason is no less of a mother. She can mother in her own way. All women can. Some will express their motherhood by raising children, others will birth new ideas in the world, some will foster, adopt, and/or support causes, people, children. The possibilities are truly endless. 

What matters most is that YOU honour your path to and through motherhood. And the world needs more women to honour their truth around being a mom. And to also let the expression of being a mom evolve as they do. And transform when needed. 

When women take the time to connect with the truth of themselves—honour their dharma and listen to their inner whispers—they may see that the fulfillment of motherhood can be different than what they thought. 

It can so much more…

MOTHERHOOD & IMPROVING OUR PLANET CAN GO TOGETHER

When we look at things as “should” and “should not” we often limit ourselves instead of seeing how the two things we think do not go together could become allies. 

In our example, instead of thinking that becoming a mom/bringing more children in the world automatically means that you are harming our planet is disempowering. 

I think one of the key ways that motherhood does harm the planet is when women follow this path without choosing it. Be it because they feel it is something they are “supposed to do” or are forced into becoming moms because of culture, religion, pressure, or worse.

That being said, when you align your life to the expression to motherhood that feels true for you, you change the world. 

So our initial question of whether you should consider becoming a mom in this crazy world is actually more than that. It becomes:

REMEMBER: PLEASURE NOT PRESSURE

In a recent post I shared with you the 6 fundamental principles to become a mom, one of them is Pleasure Not Pressure. So, before we continue, let’s take a moment to remove the weight of the world that you might be carrying on your shoulders.

Avoid feeling anxious and/or depressed by the overwhelming list of issues and choose instead to take action. look honestly at what you can do. The role you want to play in the ecosystem of our planet. Choose the part you want to play then go full out! Love the shit out of what you stand for.

You can be the next Greta Gerwig or grow a small vegetable garden from the window of your downtown apartment. Choose what aligns.

I can’t tell you what to do, but I can share a few ideas that could be beneficial—manageable and aligned with your desire for motherhood. And that go beyond the debate of choosing cloth or throw-away diapers…

As always, there is more to be said and done. But hopefully you are feeling inspired, empowered, and more aligned.

What resonates most with you? Leave a comment below!

With so much love,

Melissa

You may also enjoy:

From Aspiring Mama To “Soon-To-Be”

Want To Become A Mom? Start With These 6 Principles

How To Deal When Hopelessness & Fear Creep In

Alicia’s Birth Story

Shop items mentioned in this article:

A Complaint Free World by Will Bowen

The Life Changing Magic Of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo